Children do not owe their parents a single thing. Parents have children completely of their own volition, they usually enjoy the acts that creates the child. The child has their own life thrust upon them, and by the time they are aware of the fact that they had no choice in their creation, they can't do anything about it. Well, they can, but it would likely involve a large amount of pain and cause severe amounts of emotional trauma to those who know them. They are pressured into thinking that they have a gift, even if they don't want it, and that ending that would be a terrible thing to do - some even invoke religion, suggesting that God will send them to eternal punishment if they try to get rid of their 'gift.' I don't think anyone should be expected to repay someone for a gift that was forced upon them since before they were remotely conscious.
Imagine it this way - imagine that Person A are the Parents, and that person B is the child
A, because he wanted to, put a book in your house, unbeknownst to you. When you finally discover the book, you start to read it. The book is, in general, uneventful (kind of monotonous), though some parts in it made you laugh, other parts make you cry out of sadness, and some parts, yet, fill you with rage or disappointment. Person A, then, demands, not only that you keep the book which he wanted to give to you, but also that you pay him back for having given you the book in the first place. Though you enjoyed a few passages from it, or even if you enjoyed all of it, why should you have to pay him for slipping a book, that you didn't ask for, into your house?
I'm a little confused is this gift the parents try to convince children they have and can't get rid of: the gift of life or a gift as in something similar to a career minded talent the parents are forcing children to pursue?
ReplyDeleteIt would be the 'gift' of life. Sorry about the confusion.
DeleteI agree that children do not automatically owe their parents anything. However, any child who finds herself glad to be alive, and appreciates anything she has -- a native language, a developed sense of joy or curiosity, etc. -- certainly owes those who raised her a debt of gratitude to that extent.
ReplyDeleteI agree as well! I think that a person's childhood has a great impact on a person's life. People learn by actions and examples, for actions are powerful. For example, if a child's parents grew up smoking all their life, do you think that the child might have the tendency to smoke as well as he gets older? I think that if parents have a positive upbringing with their child, then the child will be better off in the later stages of his life. If a parent brought up a child in a negative upbringing, then I feel that this relationship with his parents will negatively effect him later on in life.
DeleteI don't quite agree. I think that parents have brought that obligation unto themselves. They would surely be awful people and parents if they forced an obligation upon themselves and then chose not to take care of that obligation. Parents have children most often of their own volition. The child has their own life thrust upon them, and by the time they are aware of the fact that they had no choice in their creation, they can't do anything about it. Well, they could, but it would likely involve a large amount of pain and cause severe amounts of emotional trauma to those who know them, including their parents whom forced the child to begin living.
DeleteEven if a child does enjoy their life because their parent fulfilled the obligations that they gave themselves, children do not owe any debt to the parents for abiding by the parent's self constructed contract. This is not to say that individuals cannot choose to pay them back, but simply that doing so would be going well beyond what is necessary; which is to say, doing nothing at all. Debt is only incurred when both people initiated an agreement at the onset of a contract.